ARE YOU SHY?
It takes real courage to admit that you would like to change something about yourself, like shyness. To admit that things are not perfect and could be better, whether it be just a little better or a lot better. In this way, everything in our lives is a journey to becoming a better version of ourselves.
Wanting to overcome shyness is no different; it's a journey to discover who you really are and what you're fully capable of when you live with courage and follow your heart. So, I don't see shyness as a negative problem, but rather the beginning of your story.
The thing about shyness is…
It can be caused by many reasons. Perhaps it's due to how you were raised, being bullied in school, or maybe it's just your natural way of being in the world. The key here is that, no matter what the reason is for your shyness, you can learn to speak up and be courageous.
This may not happen immediately or all of the time, but you can learn, for yourself, when it is important not to be shy.
How not to be shy
Notice the things in your life that you find incredibly important or joyful. These are things in life that you feel happy just doing or thinking about for no reason.
You will notice that in these moments, you feel happier, more positive, and more expressive. It's important to learn to speak up and share these things that are important to you.
You will find it much easier to overcome shyness when you are discussing these topics because you enjoy them and are passionate about them. You may have that sense with your family or friends, and the same will apply when you talk about them.
Can you stop being shy forever?
All people are shy or nervous sometimes, even me. Some people seem like they are never shy, and you'll find that if you ask them, they would tell you they've learned to mask their shyness.
These days, when I feel shy, I allow it to be. I've learned to appreciate that sometimes, that's just how I show up, and I no longer feel bad about it. I try to enjoy being myself rather than manipulating myself. I know that when it matters to me, I speak up and share what's important to me.
Learning to speak up
Growing up, my favorite thing in the world was challenging myself, socially, with fitness, and in business. Having a set challenge allowed me to give it my best effort and know that after a certain number of days, that challenge would come to an end and I would have changed for the better by going through it. Being shy, I challenged myself a lot socially.
Challenge yourself
Challenge yourself to speak up socially and do this challenge for 21 to 30 days in a row. 21 to 30 days are enough time for you to gain good experience from a repeated task and feel you have gained new insight into who you are.
Depending on the level of shyness, you might keep it really simple and challenge yourself to say hello to 5 people every day, for 21 days.
If you feel that's too easy, speak to groups of people every day.
Other options are going to events that you find interesting so you know it will be easier to speak to people at these places and have interesting conversations.
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Overcoming shyness
Overcoming shyness is a journey, rather than a destination. Taking up a challenge will give you a way of making daily progress and accumulating experience which you can reflect back on to make improvements.
Over time you will discover more about yourself, what you like to talk about, who you like to talk with, and more things you never considered. In this way, you will be learning and appreciating more of yourself and not just changing yourself but bettering your experience of life both internally, how you think about yourself, and externally how you show up in the world.
The focus of SHOOK MAN is to help people become self-aware and improve their quality of life.
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